The Non-Difference of Deity Relating Terms

I didn't know this was still a conversation until someone in one of my occult Discord servers brought it back up yesterday. I don't expect this to be a long post.

Witchcraft, magic, polytheist, and occult communities are not exempt from having trivial arguments. One of the big ones going back and forth is the use of the terms "deity work" and "deity worship" in order to name what one does with their deities. "Deity work" is meant to be a neutral term denoting that you work with your deities to get to certain goals. "Deity worship" suggests more devotional efforts, although I have personally observed a few people who feel strongly about this phrase get antagonistic about the phrase "deity work." Often, those people were revivalist polytheists who clearly had very little respect for the intimate relationships magical practitioners usually have with their deities.

Overall, there seems to be a misunderstanding from that one side that "deity work" means "getting your deities to work for you" like tools or servants instead of colleagues. This is similar to another misunderstanding I have seen people embarking on their spiritual journeys that giving offerings is somehow a transactional affair, as if you pay X number of apples to Hermes to get Y number of connections for your job search instead of recognizing that it's an exchange of gifts that you and Hermes can give to each other at any time because now you're his buddy.

(It's also important to note that there actually are traditions where you must put your spirits to work. If you do not in such frameworks, they either become ornery or unable to fulfill essential responsibilities within the framework.)

In any case, I do recognize that precision of language while communicating with other people is important in order to more effectively share your reality. I am transgender, after all, so that is sort of a specialized given. I will also say that after 5 years of connecting with a vast array of spirits—most of whom I love and a few I wish never so much as glanced my way—I don't use either phrase in regular conversation. This is because both are extremely top-level and not very illustrative.

Unlike the limitations of divine relation that the current expressions of mainstream monotheism dictate to their millions of followers, my deity relationships are diverse and intensely personal. They are my advisors, teachers, friends, family, and even romantic and/or sexual partners. One minute, I may be talking with them about formalities like learned people would expect, such as cosmological truths or the Jewish doctrines, and the next they may be reminding me that all I need to do is get my tire patched, not replaced like I'm worrying. Relationships with them, other than my asking for their larger perspectives in order to receive predictions or advice, are sometimes no different than they are with other human beings. Whatever you call that, it's love.