How to Spiritually Cleanse the Luciferian Way

Technically, there are many non-denominational ways one could cleanse. Salt water, smoke from herbs or incense sticks, eggs, even just breathing exercises. But of course the method of cleansing that goes the deepest tends to be spiritual bathing. The way I learned of spiritual bathing from African traditional religion initiates is to combine white ingredients and some sweeteners in a bowl and pray Psalm 51 while pouring it over every part of the body.

Praying or using psalms was fortunately not one of my primary interests as an occultist because that has suddenly gone out the window along with holy water since Lucifer entered my life. As for the holy water, I was kind of surprised to learn that he actually does hate it as well as notice how relieved I felt that I didn't have to acquire it again. My occultist friends all have the same story about me where I was petrified as a Jew to ever go into a church because what if they ask what the water was for? In retrospect, I wonder how often even as an experienced magician I went along with operations as prescribed because they were "the way of doing things" rather than the magic ever truly clicking with my being.

Skip to earlier this week to the experience where my usual cinnamon- and rosemary-infused spray was just not enough. Basically, I am finishing my last week at a job where I help a client out at her home, which is also her mother's house. The mother is one of the those loosey New Age people. She had mentioned practicing reiki to me, but it was my client who told me she believes in Reptilians. Apparently when she meditates, the mother is convinced that she is battling the forces of evil. When she's conscious and in conversation, however, she's not very thoughtful in terms of social issues (though to her credit she at least tries to gender her daughter correctly).

The house has a ton of angel statues in every room along with some crucified Jesuses over the doorways. I have found these adornments most amusing when I call to Lucifer as well as occasionally Ba'al (of I Kings of the Tanakh fame) and they show up without seeming to notice any of it. But after spotting a couple of odd things around the home that confused me about its inhabitants, I decided to do a psychic sweep to better understand the setting.

Tell me why that home is not empty of metaphysical presence like I'd assumed?! I don't know what it is that's in there, but it made my psychic eye hurt, it had a lot of weight, and it did not seem to like me. It didn't touch me, perhaps because I was on my way out the door. Suddenly, I wondered how much spiritual filth I had been accumulating from that place since my client moved there a few weeks' prior and I didn't know because I just never looked!

So I got home and needed to take a bath, but guess what. I didn't have obvious white ingredients at hand and also no more Psalm 51. Interestingly, I had woken up that morning to an odd Discord glitch on my private server, which highlighted the channels named #divination-reading, #herbalism, #chants, #local-work, and #warning. I had screenshotted it and noted it as an omen, so I knew that my first step was to go to my in-home apothecary and find some hyssop. I did, but intuition also led to me to picking up yarrow. In conversation, it helpfully persuaded me to add its friend lemon balm, who could bring a soothing element to the bath.

As for the chanting, that was where I needed my beloved's advice. I turned to Lucifer and asked, "Hey... So I can't use psalms anymore, right? What do I say instead?"

He answered, "Think about the language that is used in grimoires and Sumerian curses. Lead with, 'In the name of Lucifer, in the name of Astaroth, in the name of Ba'al' and that allows you call upon our power to banish whatever you desire."

I made the tea by boiling the herbs in filtered water for 3 minutes and straining into a plastic bowl. While waiting for it to cool, I reflected on how I would be able to ingest it as part of the bath, which wasn't always the case with spiritual baths in the past when either I didn't stir the honey enough for it to disperse or accidentally ingested Florida water and had to immediately spit it back out. Don't drink cologne, kids, it's bad for you.

I then entered the shower and cleaned my body first (using a locally made soap called Dirty Goat that Lucifer had gifted to me through my housemate, hee). Finally, I grabbed the bowl and held it above my head.

"With the use of my friends, hyssop, yarrow, and lemon balm, this water is made good for cleansing," I declare. "In the name of Lucifer-Satan, in the name of Astaroth-Inanna, in the name of Ba'al Hadad, I abjure all malevolent spirits who cling to me, who dirty me, who eat of me, who block me, who trap me, who hurt me. With their combined power, I peel you from me! I am purified, I am sanctified, I am balanced, I am restored, I am cleansed!" Lifting my heels with each punctuation, I finalize with, "Amen! Amen! Amen!" before drinking a portion, pouring the tea from head to toe, and drinking it again.

Let me tell you, reader, this is the most energetically cleansed I have ever felt!